Chocolate. It is medicimal for females. I cannot confirm this logically, for it is not a logical phenomenon. But illogically, it is quite proven:
We need it when we need it.
Immediately following my tonsillectomy at only two years old, I remember preferring chocolate over soothing ice cream on my post-surgery throat. My memory clearly envisions a hoarded bag of cheap chocolate stars, during my recovery; I was afraid my siblings might snatch them from me! Even though it hurt my throat, I passionately ate them.
Chocolate, in its primitive form was hidden in my mother’s underwear drawer, in the form of chocolate chips! “Now, how did you know that,” you may ask? “I’m really not sure! Probably my older sister told me.”
Further proof of the female ‘connoisseurism:’
- It was my mom’s underwear drawer, meaning she partook.
- My older/only sister told me about the secret chocolate chip hiding place in mom’s underwear drawer; proving she partook!
- I, the younger sister/daughter admittedly partook!
- No other females in the family – proving all females in the household were taken by the chocolate craving!
On my mother’s behalf, I must confess that the chocolate chips were not kept in the kitchen drawer simply because they would not make it into the cookies which were meant for the whole family’s benefit.
So days, weeks, years went by with chocolate survival limited to a hoarding level between my mom, my sister and myself!
Then, as a chocolate loving high school graduate, I was on to life – a search for chocolate all by myself. No chocolate home ties. With Mom’s chocolate chip drawer far away, I was asking myself: “Is there chocolate…at college?”
It was during this time that I learned the price of chocolate! As I wandered through the mall and smelled fresh baked chocolate chip cookies from a nearby vender, I realized I could buy for myself!
But I did not. “Too much! $$$!!! For just one? No way! I can make a whole batch for that money!” Thus limiting my chocolate consumption at this point of my life. (Remember my love for baking? See blog, “Life is Lovelier with Lace…and the Ludvigson Kitchen”)
“It’s the caffeine that I really need from a the chocolate-fix,” I tried to convince myself. And so these were the college years where I was not seen without a coffee cup in my hand, be it ceramic or styrofoam, at home or abroad.
Toward the end of those college years my chocolate consumption was limited only because I made quite a self sacrificing decision regarding my self indulgent behavior: NO sugar. This would have to include chocolate.
My! I actually refused chocolate for many years! And consumed caffeine in mega doses…there is definitely a connection!
Then came the moment of my cave in. Yes, I caved in. I totally…caved in. Let me explain.
It was 1987. Tim and I had been married, almost seven years. We lived in our Little Rock apartment. FamilyLife and our foster baby Joy were our consuming occupations.
Tim was quite busy with job responsibilities, whether in the home office or flying to conference locations. All was well, except for one thing: he was shedding weight. No matter what I cooked or baked for him to fatten him up, he continued to lose more. Initially,Tim was NOT overweight! So when he lost, it was quite revealing.
As I rolled out homemade cinnamon rolls and baked fresh chocolate chip cookies – for him (not me!) and he ate them – he continued to lose more weight! And, to my dismay, he refused to go to the doctor.
It was not until a business trip we both took to Minnesota and a consequential visit with Tim’s folks, that the answer came.
Over freshly baked chocolate cake – lovingly prepared by Tim’s mom – the answer came. Short, sweet and to the point:
“You have diabetes,” Tim’s mom blurted out with confidence that can only be gained by a mom who raised another son with that very condition. An emergency trip to the family doctor’s office only confirmed it.
Sometimes it takes the insistence of a mother-in-law to make things happen.
So now the tables were turned. Or they would be, as this confession will soon reveal.
Days, weeks, months passed by. Information, menu changes and insulin instruction were gathered and applied. We were finally settled in a new way of life.
No sugar for Tim. “Should be easy,” you might be saying, “since you were already not doing sugar.”
Yes, it should have been easy. But it was not. To this day, I cannot give a logical explanation except that, “out of love for Tim,” the following misfortunate new beginning happened to me:
A typical evening was about to transpire. Grocery shopping was needed to be done, and baby Joy needed her little bedtime routine. Tim took care of Joy and I went “Krogering.”
That illogical need (chocolate!) snapped in me as I placed the grocery items on the conveyor belt for the cashier ring up and bagging. “I need a Snicker! NO! I need TWO Snickers!”
The (female) cashier was so wonderfully understanding! She did not lecture me. She did not raise her eyebrow. She did not even ask me, “Shall I leave these out of the bag for you?”
As I made my way through the parking lot to unpack the grocery bags into my parked vehicle I had a thought, “How am I going to eat this before I get home?”
I was so confused as to why I suddenly had this unshakeable urge to consume Snicker bars. “For so many years I lived sugar free!”
With no clear reasoning coming to mind, I just drove around the neighborhood, with my groceries in route, eating Snickers quite contentedly!
And from that night on, this lady, The Ludvigson Lace Lady, has not been free of sugar, or chocolate! And Tim has!
My guess is that the stress of his new prescription of no sugar brought on an equally new sugar prescription for me! Most specifically, CHOCOLATE!
Now you may join Tim in laughable disbelief. I don’t mind. And neither does Tim!
The truth is, Tim was and still is a winner when it came to adhering to a diabetic diet. He continues to exercise great sugar restraint in his eating habits. And I do not want to make it difficult for him. So, consequently, my chocolate fixes are best met alone. And hopefully not too frequent! With zilch extravagance. A bit of cheap chocolate goes a long way!
Snicker on the Run! So if you ever see me at Walmart, adding a Snicker bar to my groceries on the conveyor belt, please join the cashier with an understanding smile. Somehow this song seems fitting as I waltz out of the store with my ‘Snicker on the Run:’
🎶’Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, in a most delightful way.’🎶
Life is Lovelier with Lace..
It is the same with my crocheted lace. It is not necessary. Quite an illogical finery. A finery that makes our female world divinely feminine. Not necessary, but without it, quite sterile.
In a day, I might be entertaining some cruel thoughts and hoping they will not accidentally escape through my mouth as discouraging words. But with a glance at some fine, illogically crocheted lace, my spirit is calmed and a trace of a smile can run through my mind and possibly flow across my face instead. “What an effect lace can have on a soul,” I muse.
“Love. Trust. Wait. Be thankful,” my Lace Counselor reminds me. And with that I take a deep breath, pick up my needle and carry on with my intertwining thread.
By the way, Valentine’s Day is just around the corner!
Don’t forget the chocolate!
~ Debbie Ludvigson
The Ludvigson Lace Lady
LUDVIGSON LACE ♡ Aftcra
My Shop: http://www.aftcra.com/ludvigsonlace
My Website: http://ludvigsonlace.simdif.com
My Blog: https://ludvigsonlace.wordpress.com